Average Joe

So, I am now where I never imagined myself. I get up monday through friday, and most of those days I put on clothes defined as "business casual". I fight traffic to get to work by 9AM, hopefully with some time to get some coffee from the break room. I then spend hours sitting at a desk doing something I can tolerate, something I occasionally love and more frequently loathe. By Friday I can't wait to just leave it all for the weekend, and the impending freedom creates a restlessness throughout our cubicled ecosystem. Now, it's the weekend, and tomorrow I will sleep in a bit before going and getting wedding registry stuff done with my beautiful fiancee.

In a nutshell, I've become average.

I am no longer a worship leader by trade... but I am still a worship leader (yay DHC!).
I am no longer a church employee... but I am still a leader.
I am no longer a student, no longer a leader of my own band, no longer a youth leader, and no longer single.
My life has changed, and it is good.

I am still creative. I am still talented, still personable, and I can still make people laugh. Who I am on the inside has only changed a little, just enough to shift my focus toward my upcoming marriage and the life changes that will entail.

As I sit there in my little metal box, waiting at that red light with the hundreds and thousands and millions, I am still me. I am still unique...

... and so is everyone else.

Before my days at Central, I used to use these blogs to put into words what my life had been teaching me. I was much more of an open book, and I miss that a little bit. I understand where they were coming from, in teaching me to be careful what I put out there, and certainly I will never again wax poetic on the specifics of my relationship or the contents of my breakfast. But I miss you being able to understand what I was going through, simply through a well-turned phrase. I miss letting you know that you aren't alone.

I want to be more balanced, more consistent... I suppose, more average.

It is said that silence is golden, but really it's just the shiny object that distracts from what really matters. Nothing can be solved through silence, and nothing can be brought to light. Silence is at best a mistake and at worst an attack.

Don't Slow Down

It gets scary sometimes. Life is a fast ride, and just when you think things are chilling out for a bit, you bank hard to the left and go screaming down a path you've never seen before. It's fun and exciting and invigorating and scary... but above all, it's necessary.

We live in an age where the world is at our fingertips. In a few keystrokes, I could apply for jobs across the country or across the globe. A few more and I could be talking to my friends in Texas, or my friends in India. We have opportunities our parents and grandparents never had, and those opportunities come with a purpose.

I'm not saying you will know that purpose, now or ever. I am simply saying that it exists. There is a reason your life is going faster and faster, and there is a reason you always seem to be able to take more than you thought you could. You were made for this world, and you were created for speed.

I know the speed is scary, but slowing down is a much more dangerous option. There is beauty in the almost reckless pace of our lives, and we'll never see it if we are constantly trying to find the brake pedal.

Over-Spiritualizing Flaws

Being around 20-something Christians intent on "finding themselves" and seeking contentment, I've noticed something interesting. It usually sounds something like:

"This is just the way I am, and I have to embrace it."

"Sometimes following God means doing what the world considers as crazy."

"I just have to be honest..."

It's cool that people are figuring out who they are, and at times we do have to embrace something about ourselves, or we do have to do something crazy for God, or there is an importance in honesty and transparency. There are times when all of these things are good, when I commend the people saying these things.

However, sometimes people are messed up, in ways they can change and work on, and they end up embracing that which they indeed can change. If you are too loud, or too rash and emotional, or too physical, or too mean... those aren't traits that you just have to live with. I'm too loud, but I've calmed down. I love physical contact, but I don't hug everyone I meet anymore. You can't use these flaws as a crutch. You need to change.

Sometimes, people aren't being crazy for Christ... they're just crazy. It's not okay. You need to get help, and work on being more sane. The world doesn't have to cater to your whims in the name of Christ. He doesn't play by your rules.

And finally... maybe, just maybe, you don't have to share what's on your mind and heart at all times. Maybe there is value to levels of intimacy, and maybe "being all things to all people so that some might be saved" means respecting people's boundaries. Honesty is great when there is intimacy, but the internet and 1000 facebook friends don't want to be intimate with you. That false sense of intimacy can lead to problems, when you realize that there is no depth to your intimate relationships.

Don't over-spiritualize your flaws. Work, try to fix them. It's important for you to not simply accept everything about yourself. I myself need to lose some weight and be more punctual. What do you need to do?

You probably shouldn't tell me, it might be too personal :-P.