The hardest part of love is selflessness. It is in our nature to expect reciprocation and response. That is not love. That is a transaction.
It doesn’t mean that this reality doesn’t tear at our hearts. When we love someone, and they do not act toward us in a loving way (especially when we ourselves have expended effort of mind, body, and/or spirit), we are hurt. We do not have the capacity to be impervious to each other… even the callous are simply in a perpetual deadened state, trading in the sharp pains of imperfect love for the dull ache of ignored longings.
So why do we hurt so much when we attempt to love? Why is love, by nature, a selfless act… when selflessness is so very difficult?
Real love is impossible without trust in God. Perfect love casts away fear, because the beloved does not worry that their actions will cause the lover to stop loving. Perfect love is based on the Eternal, trusting God to be all-sufficient, and needing nothing from the beloved. This allows every moment of love to be perceived as a beautiful gift, rather than a rightful obligation.
This is the love we should strive to have for each other. However, it is easy to say and incredibly hard to accomplish, because our hearts are not yet fully alive. The closer we are to the Savior, the more in step we are with the Spirit, and the closer we will be to this beautiful love. Our difficulty lies in our distance from God.
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